HI! I’m Tonya Phillips. a midlife meditation guide, model, and the creator of Not So Darlin’
My own path has been far from perfect. After recovering from a midlife eating disorder, I found healing through meditation and self-expression. Those practices became the foundation for everything I share today. Now I help women embrace who they are without chasing perfection, guiding them through meditations, storytelling, and style so they can soften, reconnect, and show up real in every season of life.
At the heart of Not So Darlin’ is a simple intention: to help women feel less alone.
I believe peace doesn’t come from having it all figured out it comes from accepting yourself as you are. That’s why I teach women how to style themselves from the inside out, blending mindful practices with self-expression in a way that feels approachable and doable. No pressure, no perfection, no “right way” — just real tools that fit into real life.
My purpose is to guide women back to themselves, beyond the constant pressure to look, act, or live a certain way.
I want you to feel seen, supported, and at home in your body, your closet, and your life. Whether you’re navigating change, grief, aging, burnout, body image struggles, or just that quiet feeling of “Is this all there is?”, you’re not alone. If you’ve ever felt not enough, too much, or somewhere in between — you’re my people.
Not So Darlin’ isn’t about being flawless. It’s about being fully, unapologetically you.
Through meditation and style coaching, I help midlife women clear the clutter in their minds and closets so they can find their rhythm and calm.
Personalized meditations designed to meet your needs, your season, and your style. Finally, a mindfulness practice that feels real, doable, and uniquely yours.
As a midlife model, meditation guide, and storyteller, I know how to blend confidence, presence, and personality into every frame.